Slasher Theory: More Monstrous Than Monsters

(Originally published at

What is a monster? You know it when you see it, right? Fangs…claws…wings—horrific entities that extract fear out of helpless humans.

Anyone can see the demon behind the horns, but what about the demon behind the smile? They say people are the scariest of all monsters. Unassuming citizens can slip past our defenses and stab us in the back. We’d never see it coming. A monster may have a mouth full of teeth, but a slasher understands our vulnerabilities.

The slasher’s dark attributes define what it means to be a true monster.

Monsters are limited by sharp teeth and claws. A slasher is limited by their hellish imagination, and that’s sharper than any tooth or claw. Who is the real monster?

Is a monster something with teeth?

Or is the true monster defined by its actions?

After all…

…Godzilla ain’t so scary if the pissed off lizard-thing isn’t rampaging through Tokyo. Godzilla becomes scary when it opens its fat mouth and barfs a beam of atomic energy. Jason ain’t so scary if he’s not harassing teenage campers who are trying to get laid. If Jason didn’t feel the need to machete people to death, well…he’s just some dude wearing a shitty hockey mask, and that’s not very scary.

If you happen to open your door and see a humongous psycho wearing a hockey mask, and if this demented individual just so happens to split your neighbor’s head in half with an ax, then, yeah, that’s some scary shit.

Not so scary if he’s trying to solicit a tasty box of Girl Scout Cookies. Yum.


Monsters are everywhere. They’re stuffing their faces at the local mall. They’re clogging the roads. They’re purchasing Frosted Flakes at the grocery store. How many monsters did you encounter today? You’ll never know, and that’s the slasher’s sharpest weapon—your inability to perceive the real threat.

Anyone with a brain in their cranium can see the potential threat caused by a 100ft tall lizard-thing. Who can see the threat hidden behind a pretty smile?


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Published by FlyTrapMan

I have no idea what I'm doing.

11 thoughts on “Slasher Theory: More Monstrous Than Monsters

  1. I am with you, Mr Fly…I cannot even recognise a seemingly obvious monster as I always think that it must have (had) a mother who loved it and wanted the best for it…We must now forget that it is mostly mothers who bring up the brood. Getting too serious now. Yes, the smiley monster is the most dangerous of all!

    Liked by 1 person

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